August 2025
There is a lot going on politically right now, but the politics these days affect, or will affect, all of us. Even events in other states can have consequences for us.
We were having a fundraising meeting the other day. One person in the meeting had been talking with a friend this week, and both of them realized how much the political discourse was not only affecting them, but also their relationships. We’ve all heard this from others, or perhaps you’ve experienced it yourself. Friendships, even long-term friendships, coming to an end, or families splitting along political lines, maybe a reluctance to discuss certain things or express what you believe for fear of offending or of being attacked.
I’m lucky that in my family we’re all pretty much in agreement, so we don’t have a familial breakup. But there are people with whom I don’t discuss some things.
The people in our meeting were talking about how to navigate these difficulties with relationships. One person can’t bring up the Israeli-Gaza war with her sister, even though they both love each other and want to keep a conversation going. Another person had lost a relationship with someone who had been a friend from childhood.
“(We discussed)…how to have conversations with people they disagree with from a neutral space”
There ensued a discussion about how to have conversations with people they disagree with from a neutral space, which we all agreed is helpful! I also observed that sometimes our boundaries are such that it is appropriate to end a relationship.
That happened with some good friends of mine during the pandemic. We had a disagreement about the requirements of wearing masks, and it was a serious enough disagreement that the relationships haven’t been the same since. It was sad and I miss them.
“We just discuss other things and give each other permission to have their own opinions.”
But I also still have relationships with people with whom I strongly disagree with their positions. But we are able to talk about them, or even not talk about them, and maintain friendships. We just discuss other things and give each other permission to have their own opinions.
These things are tough. But in the meeting, we all agreed that we need to approach these conversations with kindness and respect, even if we strongly disagree with the other person. There is so much disrespect, blame and abuse in our discourse now that it is important we don’t match that energy and bring it into our space. Our space is too important and the way we treat ourselves and others around us is too important.
…being “loyal to your own soul”.
One book about spirituality I have read several times talks about being “loyal to your own soul”. That phrase has always resonated with me. It puts the perspective on oneself, on keeping our attention where it needs to be, in the sense that we don’t have to care so much about what others think about us. It doesn’t mean we don’t care about others, just about needing their approval. It does mean that we remember who we are underneath everything and that we make that a priority. In the Bible it says, “Love your neighbor as yourself.” Yourself comes first.
When I was young I would sometimes feel embarrassed out in the world with my Dad because he didn’t care what others thought about him and would behave in ways that I thought would cause people to look at us. But now I really appreciate that about him. He let himself be himself during those times.
Kindness to oneself precedes kindness to others. In these times, it is easy to let the abuse and disrespect into our space and then react in a similar fashion with ourselves and others. But we are careful with our boundaries and don’t let ourselves go there. We can maintain our own vibration and be loyal to our own soul.
Thank you for your ongoing support of Psychic Horizons / Church of Natural Grace!
Best regards,
Rev. Laura Hopper
