You might be under a lot of stress. I see stressed out people all the time, some here at school but also other folks. The stress often involves jobs and/or money, sometimes families and relationships, and sometimes politics. I’ve discovered that many people like stress or drama in their lives to keep things interesting, or because it makes them feel important, or because they feel that if there’s no stress then they’re not really accomplishing anything.
Ask yourself whether or not you really want to be at peace.
So if you find yourself feeling stressed out, the first thing to do is to ask yourself whether or not you really want to be at peace with yourself, or if you prefer to have the drama around stress. If your information is that you do want to be at peace, then regardless of your situation, there are ways of decreasing the stress and increasing peacefulness within you.
Look at yourself in your last stressful situation. Were you stressed out because that’s your habit pattern, or your family’s pattern? What was your internal stress about – not the external situation, but your own personal experience of the stress? In other words, any situation we are in is because there is some picture, past memory or belief with a lot of energy in it that is causing us to be in that situation. What is your picture/belief? What happened to your grounding in that situation, and where was your attention?
Take ownership of your own pictures and beliefs.
When you begin to identify and take ownership of your own pictures and beliefs, then you can have an understanding of why the stress is happening. Undoubtedly these same pictures cause anxiety in other situations as well. You can ask yourself if that’s what you want, or whether it is something you want to transition out of.
I have a couple of friends who are very focused in on the political situation. The problem for them is that it causes them a lot of anxiety. They don’t make separations from the political state of affairs, so it affects them personally a great deal. I know other people who also follow the political situation, but who do make separations from it, so that it doesn’t get into their space. They have more peace in their lives.
Stop blaming others.
Another way to have more peace is to stop blaming others. You can look at who you are blaming, whether it’s someone currently in your life, or maybe somebodies from your past. Either way, when you are blaming others it creates resentments and anger, and perhaps feelings of being out of control.
I know that I did that in relation to my parents. I blamed them for the way I was raised and for the many “wrongs” they hoisted on me. Thanks to all the blaming that I did, I had a difficult relationship with my parents, and I felt victimized by them. During some meditations, I was able to take back that blame and to take responsibility for my own upbringing (since I had my own pictures and beliefs that were causing my situations). My relationship with my parents changed dramatically, and we had a really good relationship until the time that they died. And I was at peace with myself about my relationship with them.
I talk a lot in all my classes about where you put your attention – in a worry or anxiety, in the future, in a “what if”, in some story taking place in your head, in the past, etc. Sometimes your attention is in the feeling of resistance, because you don’t want to do what you are doing, and you want to be somewhere else. Maybe you’re avoiding something, but that avoidance is causing underlying tension in your body.
Having your attention anywhere but the present can cause stress.
Having your attention anywhere but the present can easily cause stress. For example, I was raised in another country, so I have flown many times, and I was never afraid of flying until one day several years ago I found myself having that fear. It seemed really weird to me considering how experienced I was with flying.
I had that fear for several flying experiences, then began to examine where that fear was coming from. I realized I was going into the “what ifs” – what if we have turbulence and the pilot loses control of the plane, what if the plane is too heavy and doesn’t get off the ground during takeoff, etc. When I kept my attention in the present, with where I was and what I was doing, the fear went away. Now it is again more pleasant to fly.
So there are many ways to be more at peace with yourself. You can try a few things, especially asking yourself if you really do want to be at peace. If so, then happy transitioning!
As always, thanks for supporting Psychic Horizons & the Church of Natural Grace with your sustainable giving! It truly makes a difference, both for us and for you.
Best regards,
Rev. Laura Hopper
Originally posted October, 2019
